Devoted.

We didn’t win the competition, but when I reflect on our Big Year I am proud. These are the days when I find it hard to be mindful outside of work. I ruin pots when distracted I leave them unattended on the stove. Yesterday, I found the jar of jelly in the spice cabinet two days after I used it. Too often I put the cheese away in the pantry or leave it on the counter and by the end of the day it’s crystalline. I return to the driveway moments after pulling out because I forgot a towel for swimming. I’ll open an app I have no need for and stare at it unsure why I’m there.

But,

I learned to tell a Phoebe from any other bird by how it perches and forages. I practiced this on both coasts. I can identify a Kestrel by silhouette, both on a perch and in the sky. I know the differences among all the Grebes. I know where to find Burrowing Owls in the Salton Sea area. I learned that Cactus Wrens croak and aren’t shy. I know that the most colorful Kingfishers are female and I saw them in three states. I know a Northern Flicker when I see one. On day 366 I learned how to tell a Cassin’s Kingbird from a Western – the tip of its tail feathers. I eavesdropped on the Phainopeplas’ love song. I don’t have to look to know if it’s a Blue-Grey Gnatcatcher, Blue Grosbeak, California Thrasher, Scrub Jay, Acorn Woodpecker, or a Spotted Towhee talking around me on the trail. I’m irrationally devoted to House and Bewick’s Wrens even though they move carelessly around Orlando in the yard. I cried when our resident House Finch chick died and also because I didn’t get to see its siblings leave the nest while we were away.

The 2021 birds reminded me that my brain still works. I’m alive. Birding is a practice in awareness and feeling. I am human, not a computer zombie.

Before our trail race in May, Alison wished us well:

I wasn’t in the best shape and there was a spot during the race where I needed to walk. The moment I started running again, I heard cheep cheep cheep tik tik tiiiik from the bushes. As if a couple of birds were ecstatic about my new pace. The clanging of little bells. The sweetest sound I’d ever heard. Alison and David were there with me.

There are so many to choose from, but these two photos represent my 2021 Big Year.

The sparrow my Dad saw on the course during that race:

And the awe of birding and sharing it with friends:

Thank you all for helping me find focus during a time of information overload. I’m in disbelief of all that I was able to learn with your help, and all that there is still to know.

Good birding,

Blair